bb

hm
new city, new friends, new life. it's really great you know, i can do whatever i want, there are no bonds and stuff, i can start things again. no bad remembers from that damn past. (by the way there is no past or future, only present. if you say this will be the future, it is the present at that time, and now it's the past.. long story). old friends? no, they dont give a shit. perhaps it's better this way, good memories bring them back, and also awesome parties, but who know when will me and my precious get invited next time.
also the chick next door is really sweet and funny and *cute*

i can't live with my feelings, not like keeping them for myself, but i'm afraid of what she says, and how she will reject me, like she did a year ago. i don't really have others to talk to so i decided to find some personality tests to see if it helps. the results:
Disorder | Rating
Paranoid: Moderate
Schizoid: Low
Schizotypal: Very High
Antisocial: Moderate
Borderline: Very High
Histrionic: High
Narcissistic: Moderate
Avoidant: High
Dependent: Very High
Obsessive-Compulsive: Low
well i doesn't really help. i don't know what to do with them please heeelp, i'm about to..

stupid guy going down the road, seems to be happy still he looks awkward. sun is about to set..
shopping center closing, telephoneshop getting repaired, poor guy standing at the wall, houses and gardens washed by light rain and he arrives to a house.
in a half hour he runs to the bus stop to visit two friends.
big fucking party in the city. joining the eu and stuff..
a there she is. she is just beautiful. the stupid guy almost like drooling. the other guy comes too, they go into a pub.
that damn stupid guy is living in a dreamworld again, when noone talks to him he holds his head like there's hell inside, i can understand him, the lady's smile makes him blind. he is so into that girl that he barely can think of anything else, however the lady can be really slutty and freak out for anything she is not pleased to hear.
the night is almost over, that stupid brat is not needed anymore, their road aparts.
houses and gardens smelling great, poor guy sleeping at the wall, telephoneshop cries alone, shopping center opening.
the sun is about to rise, he seems troubled again, being in love, living in fear of love, still he looks pity. stupid guy going up on the road..

it took many couple of month to understand things such as you can't change your destiny. when you realize something it wrong with it, it's already too late to change it..
but the fact that you always have little suprises should help to survive those hard days, you just have to open the doors for them, wiat patient for them to appear or find you, and always use them..
tonite i just found something like that..
updated at favourites..